The Creativity Curse

There’s a phrase that started leaving my mouth at a very early age: “I could make that.”  Knut will tell you I have the hardest time shopping for anything.  Well, I enjoy shopping, but I have a hard time actually buying things.  I love to go around a store and be inspired to make stuff.  I look at a sweater and say “I could make that.”

We’ve had in on our list to get curtains for our living room.  For the longest time, I thought: “Why buy them if I can make them so easily?”  Well, I did buy fabric, left the fabric near the window for awhile to be sure that it went with the room, finally sewed the fabric into drapes and guess what?  I absolutely hated the color when they were done.  Fortunately, they work really well in the boys room…which was further down the list for curtains.

After picking fabric, actually sewing it up, and encountering failure my sewing-for-home-mojo was lost a bit.  New covers for the couch pillows in the den?  I could make that.  Add it to the pile.  Recover the chair in our bedroom upstairs?  I could do it.  Add it to the pile.  Redo the seats to the chairs in the kitchen with the incredibly dated gold plastic?  I could make that.  Add it to the pile.

Unfortunately for our house, Knut has the “I could make that” issue as well.  I can’t tell you how much fun it was when our washing machine broke a few years ago.  I mean, it wasn’t fun.  However, calling a repair guy to come out that same day, bring a part, have it done, and be on his way was incredibly fabulous.  It was done immediately with a phone call because it was something neither Knut or I could fix.

I hit a breaking point recently when Knut was swatting a fly in the kitchen.  The fly had landed on the curtains in there, and Knut gave a hard swat and killed the fly and ripped the old curtains.  I’ve been meaning to replace those curtains, so I wasn’t too horrified.  However, it was a really obvious tear right in the middle, and I have no wish to fix something that is on the “replace soon” list.  No, it just moves it up to the “replace now” list.

It was when I admitted out loud to Knut: “I could make new curtains.  In fact, I’ve been looking for just the right fabric for them for over 2 years.  I’m not any closer.  I am not looking forward to this project.  You know what?  I should buy curtains!”

I know.  Those words hardly ever leave my mouth: “I could buy that!”  After a shopping date with my sister via our cell phones and laptop in front of each of us thousands of miles apart, I picked out curtains for both the kitchen and dining room.

I feel so wild.  I never just buy something. I may or may not have been hyperventilating and needed my sister on the phone to help me click the “place order” button.

Also, I bought a sweater at Target that I liked.  It was even one that would have been so easy to make!  In fact, as I tried it on, I was thinking of what yarn I would have used instead had I made it.  It was one of those “boyfriend sweaters” that are so popular now with some fun leather buttons.  I so could have made it. 

Knut could not be more pleased that I’m checking things off my list like replace a 20 year old hand me down sweater that I wear around the house, and finish the curtains that have been on the list to replace for years and I’ve just been overly indecisive.

I even bought noodles at the store last week.  Even though I know how to make them.  Mine are better (not to mention cheaper), but it’s nice to have something quick to grab. 

It’s so much fun to make stuff, but when I’m as behind on everything as I am…it feels better to be caught up than to have made everything myself.  It takes some getting used to, but I’m finding a little balance…for now.