I’m Not Feelin’ It

I apologize ahead of time, if this post feels like a downer. If it does, it isn’t meant to be. It’s supposed to be just a reflection on a season.

I’m not feelin‘ this whole Christmas thing this year.

It’s not that I don’t want to! I love Christmas. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I listen to Christmas music 95% of the time when I’m in my sewing room. OK…99.9%. I am all about Christmas music, and still as an adult, I love to lay underneath a brightly lit Christmas tree and just soak it all in.

I love making handmade Christmas presents. I’m always afraid that I’m going to be like “that aunt” in “A Christmas Story” who sends her nephews embarrassing pink bunny costumes for Christmas. I work really hard to make “cool” presents. For my kids, it’s pretty easy, because for some reason, the really appreciate someone taking the time to make them something. (At least, at this age they do.) I lucked out that way.

I love unpacking all of my snowman things that can stay out way past Christmas. I love arranging the nativity just right, and I love the bursts of red color that seem to appear in every corner of the house.

But this year, I’m not feelin‘ it. I haven’t made Christmas cookies yet, and even if I did, Knut wouldn’t eat as many because he’s watching what he eats as his ski race is coming up this winter. (You’d think more cookies for me would be incentive.)

Perhaps it’s because all my Christmas boxes are still way up high in my garage, and I’ve been too busy to get them. Knut’s been to busy to, as they’re having to babysit the grain dryer at night now too. The wind blows the moisture coming off the dryer into the dryer’s fan, and the subzero air freezes that moisture on the fan, stopping the dryer. His awake time at home seems to be less than an hour a day. He’d say his asleep time at home isn’t much more!

That’s right, it’s still harvest.

Still... Harvest.

Can you really put up Christmas decorations during harvest? I have about as much desire to set out the Easter eggs.

Not only that, but with Sassy Pfaffy still waiting for her part at the “spa” I can’t work on finishing my Christmas presents. If I can’t sew, what’s the point of listening to Christmas music?

I read through Sergio’s entire manual today, and have all my sewing projects cut and ready to go on my cutting table. I think I might bug the sew and vac again tomorrow. They are sew patient with me. (I’m sorry…I really couldn’t help it.)

We’ve already celebrated Christmas with Knut’s maternal side of the family. We had lefse and krumkakke and everything. Still not feelin‘ it. You’d think the weather and snow would bring it out of me.

It’s not. I just makes Knut work one more long day, and makes me feel one more day behind.

Still, I should just do it. I should just pull out the white lights, the oatmeal wreath I made when I was in kindergarten, the lefse grill, the advent calender (which we’re already REALLY behind on), and heat some apple cider on the stove. Good! I’m getting myself pumped up. I can do this! I’ll love it. It will be great! I can do it even though I still have no idea where to put any decorations in this house and my husband isn’t here.

Wait…I lost it. I’ll start pumping myself up on Monday. Tomorrow’s too busy.