I forget sometimes how much I love the days after Christmas about as much as the days before. The days before Christmas are full of anticipation and lots of preparation. My parents came for the week of Christmas. It became a busy house and it was lots of fun. They make it so special every time they come. The kids (especially David) thrive on routines so we had an unusual amount of meltdowns (especially David) so that made it extra full. Christmas was the first time in all these months David really had a tough time with his restrictive diet. He normally doesn’t even shrug when given a different meal or a different cookie, but it was weighing on him this time. Plus for a guy who thrives on routine and schedules, not knowing what was going on each day literally exhausted him. The other kids are just coming down from the normal holiday-high.
We will try to see if our tree will stay up until the 12th day of Christmas (epiphany) but in the meantime, we celebrate the New Year’s. I’m extremely anxious to get the kids back at school. I’ve already started assigning them random schoolwork so they have something to do besides bug me. I’ve assigned basically fun things, but things that must be done at any rate.
I’m spending time writing in a journal, and laying out some goals for this next year. I’m just trying to spend some time reassessing what I’m doing, and bad habits that might have crept up. I’m bringing out my homeschool planner which I love (but honestly haven’t picked up since November-ish). We get into a routine at school and I don’t always look to see which lesson we should be on; I just do the next lesson. I get to a point in the school year where we just do the next thing.
I’ve gotten back into the habit of sleeping in until 8-8:30 again for quite awhile as Knut and Silje handle breakfast duty. I’m nearly 10 weeks pregnant now, so fatigue is normal, but I’ve been sleeping in way longer than 10 weeks. I keep telling myself that Knut needs this time with just him and the kids, and that I have earned my sleep, etc.
But the truth of the matter is, Knut and Silje really need me down there at breakfast. I’ve keep reading about the benefits of having alone time as a mom in the morning, to spend time with God, maybe exercise, read a book. I have my alone time after everyone has gone to bed, and the wonderful thing about it is that alone time could be indefinite. I could stay up to midnight, 1am, and no one will stop me.
But I’m really not getting done many things that I want to get done and I feel called to get done with this evening-alone-time-system. I want to switch to a morning system, for myself, for focus, for health, and for my husband. I’ve decided I’m going to try again.
This getting up in the morning thing is like my bad diet.
But I don’t want to trend-diet. I want a lifestyle change. I want to be a person who loves mornings. I want to get enough sleep and not binge watch Netflix series. I don’t want to waste my life just watching shows.
So I will try again.
I even have a page in my goal journal of things that I will tell myself to pick myself up when I fail. I need a plan to get up and brush off the disappointment in myself, and try again, because I know me. So far that page is blank, but I’m working on it.
Honestly I’m scared. Not because getting up in the morning is so hard, but because this is a cycle I go through. I know there’s not something super special or religious or pious about getting up early in the morning. I know it doesn’t make me holier. And yet I want it. I feel called to do it. I want to be there for my husband, and not wake up to chaos. It should not be this hard. People get up when they have jobs. I know being a mom is a job too, and a homeschool mom is an extra full job, so why can’t I get up in the morning?
So I have a plan, or at least the start of one. It won’t start January 1, but perhaps sometime soon in January.
I am giving myself a bedtime, and I’m going to enforce it. I’ve discussed this with Knut so he knows I’ll be going to bed waaaaaaay earlier. (Like, *gasp* 10 or 10:30.)
I’m doing a mini makeover to my “sanctuary space” in my bedroom. It’s going to be an exciting place to wake up to see. We have a big bedroom and there are 2 soft, tattered chairs in the corner and a little painted garage sale table. I just bought a vintage (fancy-used) electric kettle and I’m going to have water in it the night before, and make myself a cup of tea when I get out of my bed. I splurged on a matching vintage teacup.
We all know that if I stick a toe outside my room multiple children will wake up. So all me-time will happen in my bedroom. I’m hanging pictures there that I bought long ago but never hung. I might write out some verses with a fancy pen. I think I’ll arrange some candles there. I might replace the dingy lampshade over there.
I’m bringing my exercise mat up there, in the corner, and maybe our pup Lena will have to watch me do some stretches.
I think I just need to mentally switch to having my alone time to the morning so it’s not endless like it currently is at night. I need to place limits on myself so I don’t abuse my time. I want to live intentionally. I have done this before for a few months, and then I slip back into the night owl mode.
Truthfully, it’s scary to try something again that you want but you have failed at doing so many times before. I keep telling myself that people who succeed aren’t the people who never fail, it’s people who get back up after they fail. Oh, I need to write that down in my notebook. “My failures do not define who I am in Christ” might be another thing I write in there. “He makes all things beautiful in His time.” OK, I need to finish this up so I can go back to my notebook. I’m on a roll.
But help me out here a little. What are your tricks for getting up early and on time? I would love to hear from all you morning people out there how you do it, and if any of you get up early even though you are NOT a morning person like me, I’d love to hear your tricks.
I may not do this flawlessly, but I will do it grace-fully.